Trust me, the braintrust that runs this sports department is well aware of how A) young, and B) talented this Waynesboro girls soccer team is and will be. There’s no argument there, but to send e-mails and make phone calls to this sports columnist because he wrote about how young and talented the Wilson Memorial girls soccer team is was just ludicrous. Also, it’s very “unadult-like.” Something those same “adults” would say only a 12-year-old would do.

Hey, Little Giants, none of this is your fault (I’m talking to the players, mom and dad, so don’t you go thinking I’m changing my mind on how dumb your e-mails were). Yes, I’m aware (even if some of your parents aren’t) that in Augusta FC you play on the same teams with some of those Wilson Memorial girls. Heck, you probably call a few of them “friends” or “pal” or whatever the latest term of endearment is in your text-messaging and e-mail lexicon. (Let me know what it is, I try to stay hip.)

You got a season to worry about. You have a regional berth up for grabs. You have four quality captains—Junior Bree Simonsen along with seniors Courtney Freed, Cammy Nasholds and a back-from-injury Kristin Berrang -- that can make you realize what comes from the stands isn’t important.

You got a coach, Robin Hersey, who has a track record of nurturing young talent into winners.

The captains? You four got a freshman goalkeeper to coach through a stretch run and a slew of other youngsters whose skills need to honed.

Yeah, don’t worry about what those in the stands said. Remember, all a couple of parents did was, well, be parents. Ask yours how many times grandma and grandpa did something that embarrassed them whilst they were in high school. The only problem is, some of your parents forgot about that.

Here’s hoping you don’t.

And another thing: What are a few of these parents trying to do? Really. I want to know. If they wanted an article similar to this one written about their kids, why didn’t they follow Coach Hersey’s lead and let us know that, hey, your team is young too. What were these few trying to accomplish by throwing insults at Wilson Memorial and its fans? Don’t they realize that girls on both these teams are friends with each other and play together in Augusta FC? Do we need a youth-soccer Civil War? I mean, last time we had a Civil War in Augusta County, things didn’t work go too swimmingly. Just ask Jubal Early.

This is why Derek McDaniel may be the greatest thing to happen to Wilson baseball since Bo Bowers: “We are not a good team,” he said after Wilson lost 10-2 to Luray on Wednesday. “I’m not being negative to my kids, because we are not a good team. We don’t make that plays that we need to make and good teams do that.”

With McDaniel at the helm, they’re gonna be good soon. You know, like football.

Thankfully, we all know Waynesboro baseball parents won’t send us any e-mails on how much better their team is and how bad Wilson is. You know, like a certain other group. (See above.)

Speaking of Wilson and other sports played on something we call a diamond: I wouldn’t worry too much about the Green Hornets losing to Luray, pardon the pun, but that race is going to be a dogfight until the end.

Speaking of dogfights: Waynesboro baseball’s magic number is two, if they can beat Rockbridge tonight and Fort Defiance on Friday (both games on the road) then all Jim Critzer and his Little Giants have to worry about is Region III. Must be nice ...

Finally: The Southern Valley DoeStink gives soccer fans something to cheer about. On Friday the Waynesboro boys and girls teams play an at-home doubleheader against Rockbridge. Go ahead and call it a day of soccer. Or maybe Pack the Pitch night. Or, how about, Purple Power.

Whatever you call it, here’s hoping some of the parents leave their laptops at home. They’ve already sent too many e-mails.

“I think, long ago, I wished that,” Berrang said Tuesday before she took the field against Stuarts Draft. “Probably because I was lazy. But once you get injured and you’re not able to play and do something you love, you figure out how much it’s not fun to be on the sidelines.”

So that’s why she was so happy. Happy enough to smile the whole time, and flail her arms around as she talked about finally, after three months of healing from a broken ankle that sidelined her the week before the Group AA indoor track meet, being back on the pitch. She’s a player, not a coach, and while screaming “man on, man on” from the sidelines might be all fine and dandy for Robin Hersey, it’s not for a girl he named captain during her sophomore season.

“To have to watch from the sidelines, it’s not the first thing I want to do,” she said.

But she saw the game in a whole new light, she saw how the young Little Giant team worked together and what their weak spots were. Always the student (a University of Virginia bound student at that, a decision made on Tuesday with dad, Chris, no doubt emptying his checking account to pay for it, we’re guessing, sometime today), Berrang noted those weak points and made an effort, when she returned, to erase them.

Her first match back was last week against Turner Ashby. But in the cold and wind Tuesday, you would have thought it was her first game ever. Berrang excitedly lifted her right leg to point out the broken bone and made no bones about it—she was happy to be back.

In her second game back, she notched three assists against Wilson Memorial. At home against Draft on Tuesday, Berrang hooked up with Taylor Sayre twice.

“It was really nice to get those three assists,” she said. She’s right, it’s always good to come back and help the team.

All Hersey could say was the obvious when asked if it was good to have Berrang back.

“It sure is,” he said.

He’s right and Berrang is happy.

“You figure out how much it’s not fun to be on the sidelines,” she said. “And I just figured out how much I do love the game.”

Just watch out for her flailing arms, they’ll take your head off, man.

And another thing: Last week Berrang was named the Virginia High School League Group AA Female Athlete of the Year. (Why are we just hearing about this WHS? Seriously.) It takes into account grades—she pulls a GPA above 4 (gee, what’s that like, please. Somebody tell us, we never sniffed a 3 in high school)—community and school service. We’d list everything Berrang does but, well, we don’t have all day to type.

All we can say is, good on you Kristin Berrang. Good on you.

Miss her yet, Waynesboro? Don’t worry, you will.

Falling behind to Broadway: Not good.

Waynesboro baseball coming back to pick up an 8-5 win: That’s swagger.

Seriously, if there’s a hotter RBI producer than Josh Craig in the Southern Valley District right now, e-mail me and let me know.

Waiting ... waiting ... waiting ...

Yeah, thought so.

Just what the doctor ordered: To say it’s been a roller-coaster season for Josh Podgorski and his Cougars would be an understatement (though not good enough to warrant an entry into the 2008 Understatement of the Year contest). That’s why Tuesday’s 6-5 extra-inning win over R.E. Lee was big for Stuarts Draft.

Remember, this is a team that had lost three extra-inning affairs, two of them on walk-off homers. So when R.E. Lee tied the game up in top half of the seventh, don’t blame any Cougars (or Podgorski for that matter) if they started shooting each other “here-we-go-again” looks in the dugout.

But Seth Via’s bloop single to score Mickie Holbert in the bottom of the eight put the kaibash on that.

“Team character comes into play when you are trailing late into a ball game and when things are not going the way you want,” Podgorski said. “It was nice to see our kids show some character and determination to fight back and tie the game and then win it.”

Did somebody ship some swagger down the Target Turnpike? Just asking.

Real quick like: Somebody pat Kalee Robinson on the back when you see her in the halls of Waynesboro this week. The freshman midfielder turned into a goalkeeper to fill in for another freshman net minder—the injured Kate Garber. According to Hersey, she did a great job.

Seriously, did you pat her yet?

So leave it to the Green Hornet girls JV team to raise expectations. While the varsity girls are taking their lumps on the steady climb to respectability, it’s the JV team, along with the young guns on the varsity, that have people in Fishersville excited about what is to come on the pitch.

After its win over Waynesboro on Friday, the JV team sits with an 8-0 record and, despite the anticipation of losing a few players to the varsity team in the coming year, that team looks to reload as well in 2009.

The reason? Travel teams like Augusta FC.

“I think if you look at the type of player we’re getting from travel clubs like Augusta FC, the quality of players is improving every year,”
said JV coach Todd O’Brien through his noticeable Wisconsin accent. “You don’t have to worry about the technical things as much, you can start working on the tactical.

“The more you can focus on the tactical over the technical, the better off you’re going to be.”

Technically, O’Brien is right.

But all Augusta County schools along with the two cities should be reaping the benefits of Augusta FC. The Hornets are starting to see it already.

Because, and let’s face it, what’s going on here is what everybody expected to happen when the youth-soccer explosion started. The Hornets, and other teams, are starting to see soccer players, not athletes playing soccer. This is a good thing and it’s finally happening.

And another thing: Jim Critzer wanted the world to know that wrapping swagger is pretty easy.

“It’s called No. 12,” he said.

That’s Jeremy Hahn, the Waynesboro southpaw that no-hit R.E. Lee on Friday in a 12-1 mercy-rule shortened game. (Of course, these kind of games were once called “slaughter-rule wins” but, you know, you can’t use “slaughter” when referring to anything involving kids. Never mind the fact you can totally screw them out of a big fan base by not scheduling basketball games the right way, but, I’m sorry, let me digress.) Hahn, who has enough swagger for the whole Little Giants team, needed just 75 pitches and struck out five to earn his first career no-no.

“I felt amazing today,” Hahn said.

Really? Ladies and gentlemen let us present to you another entry into the 2008 Understatement of the Year Award.

Hahn, much like all pitchers, knew who to thank for the win. You know, like Will Freeman, who’s been quiet at the plate all season long, but made a diving catch on a slicing fly to right field. And, oh, how about the run support there, Hahn? Of course he thanked them too.

“Eric Hall was huge,” he said.

Hall sure was, slapping an RBI single in the Giants’ three-run third that sealed the deal for the Little Giants, kept them undefeated in the Southern Valley with a 5-0 record and pushed their overall mark to 10-3.

Hmmm, the last guy to pick up his first career no-no in a Giants uniform was Jake Peeling. It happened last year, and we all know what the Little Giants did last year, right?

Of course, Critzer isn’t going to rest on his team. Always the critic, the Tabasco-laced ball coach still sees need for improvement and, once again, it’s the bottom of the order, Nos. 6, 7 and 8 to be exact.

“They are doing things,” he said, “but we need more consistency on offense.”

Good news for Giantdom, the players don’t seem to be resting on anything either.

“We just got to stay focused now,” Hall said. “This win doesn’t mean anything if we lose the next two.”

True dat. True dat.

Don’t look now, but Critzer was thoroughly impressed with R.E. Lee freshman hurler Taylor Davis, who got some innings in against the Little Giants. Critzer, who is pretty high on his own freshman hurler, Drew DeMoss, is just as high on Davis.

“He’s going to be a force in the Valley,” Critzer said.

Yes, Taylor Davis, your table will soon be ready, with battles against DeMoss just around the corner.

OK, so Buffalo Gap baseball goes out and gets a big Shenandoah and rivalry win over Riverheads, you know, because these two schools love beating each other in everything. Forensics, quiz bowl, tiddlywinks, chess, checkers, Future Farming of America, everything folks. And I’m reading the story about the Bison’s 3-2 win over the Gladiators and I’m saying the Gap names out loud as I read. Come on, join me.

Ryan Sheridan.

Boone Jones.

Travis Morris.

Josh Wenger.

You know, a few guys who won a state title in football. Of course, then you look at their skipper, Chad Coffey who, well, all he did was go out in his first year and coach the Bison girls basketball team to a Group A, Division 1 state title. And the whole time I’m thinking, “gee, why not?”

Even in the loss, Riverheads pitcher Cody Montgomery “Burns” pitched, pardon the pun (again), excellent.

Thanks.

But, hey man, this is a big game, like all Southern Valley District contests are (duh, of course), and Hahn is doing everything he can to become that big-time pitcher the Giants are going to need if they hope to get a sniff of a deep postseason run. So, what does he do? Well, he turns it around and strikes out the next three batters.

No runs that inning for the Cougars.

No runs that inning for the Cougars.

Yep, Happy Birthday Jim Critzer.

“[Hahn] wasn’t throwing a lot of strikes,” Critzer said. “But he did a heck of a job getting out of that second inning.”

(Sniff, sniff) I smell some much-needed swagger.

That was all for The Swag Man (Hahn) after his get-out-of-a-jam second and in comes Joseph Lucas who, once again, shuts down the Cougar bats, strikes out five and proves that when it comes to quality lefties, the Little Giants have the market cornered and sure as heck don’t look like they’re going to sell anytime soon.

The result: An 8-1 Little Giants’ win and the season sweep of the Cougars.

Somebody tell me what the heck has gotten into Josh Craig? Really? Seriously, the Giants’ big dog (or Hammy as the team calls him) drives in three key runs and finished the night 3-for-4.  The past two years everybody clad in a purple and gold shirt (or jersey, or jacket, or hoodie) has been waiting for Craig to come into his own at the plate. It’s pretty safe to say that, yeah, he’s here.

Josh Craig, you know your table is ready.

“The team was relaxed and they guaranteed me a win today,” Critzer said.

Like we said, Happy Birthday Jim Critzer.

Hey, how about Eric Hall? Both teams’ bats were pretty hush-hush for the first two innings until Waynesboro started to go the work in the top half of the second. (Well, the Giants did score one run in the first.) After a Lucas single, Hall waits for walk, showing a good batting eye, to set up Thompson’s sac-fly that turned into a run scoring error on the Cougar outfield. Guess who drove in Thompson and Hall with a single to make the score 4-0?

Hey, Josh Craig, you sitting at the table yet? Make room for Eric Hall, you know, the kid that slapped that first-inning RBI double. The guy you drove in with a single. Remember, one your three RBI?

And another thing: “On the way here, on the bus, we were all pumped up to play Draft. We wanted to shut them down,” Hahn said.

Happy Birthday, Jim Critzer.

A question for you: How does one wrap and put a bow on swagger? Hey, I’m just asking.

This isn’t the pits: When it comes to the long jump at Waynesboro, you’re usually only hearing two names — Will Walter and Tim Brown. So where the heck did Kevin Jackson come from?

The freshman (yes, I just said typed “freshman” ) held the mark to beat for the most of the day during Waynesboro’s lone home quad-meet Wednesday with Stuarts Draft, Rockbridge and Grace Christian.

Holding onto the top spot until the end (Walter, of course, eventually won the thing): Lots of hard work.

Being humble, and smart, enough to say it’s all thanks to hard work: Classy.

For a freshman, eliciting this quote from Walter, “First off, I don’t know what Kevin came out of. He’s in the ninth grade, but he killed it today.”: Priceless.

Kevin Jackson, welcome to the big-boys club. Enjoy your stay.

One last thing: Driving through Greenville (is that place a town too?) last night, I saw the sky lit up just east of U.S. 11. Getting closer I could make out what it was. Yep, Greenville (town or no? Clue me in) has lighted baseball fields.

Wake up, Waynesboro!

And let’s keep the answers serious, OK. Leave the smart-aleck stuff to me. I want to know why it is that a town (is it even a town?) like Fort Defiance (a town? Really?) can have lighted tennis courts for its high school but Waynesboro, with the nicest soccer pitch and track in the area, can’t slap a couple of lights up a few feet away (where the tennis courts are located) so the Little Giants tennis teams don’t have to stop matches on account of darkness.

Just a thought. Waynesboro is a city (a city, albeit, that likes to shuffle its kids under a rug and pretend like they’re not here. And you know it’s true. Don’t send me any e-mails that say “Oh, look at our YMCA” or “But gee-whiz Sacco, we got ourselves a Boys and Girls Club.” Nah, keep that to yourselves because I actually, you know, have to talk to high school kids for things we call “articles” and “columns” and “all-local blogs that don’t talk about the NBDL and other national topics I learn about by watching ESPN and rehashing the opinions as my own when there’s countless stuff to blog on right under my nose.” And what these kids talk about is, most of them, they can’t wait to get the heck out of here because there’s nothing for them to do. … wait … why am I still writing in parenthesis?) OK, fixed it.

Back to what I was saying, you know if Waynesboro cared one iota about its kids it would give them something to do, it would give them lighted ball fields, aging residents of this town wouldn’t call the cops when a few kids are playing football in an alley (I’ve heard the calls go out over the scanner folks, so don’t e-mail me and tell me I’m making this up) or the police wouldn’t be forced to hassle skateboarders who are, well, just skateboarding. (Trust me, when I was in high school, skateboarding was the least “illegal” thing I did.)

But, alas, we all get old don’t we. We all lose touch with what it was like to be stuck in a small town with nothing to do. Thankfully, the folks out in Fort Defiance (really? Is it a town, yes or no?) never forgot. And have themselves some lighted tennis courts. Good on you, Indian nation. Good on you.

And another thing: But it’s OK for the City of Waynesboro to bend over backwards for big-box stores on the West End. You know, big-box stores that have helped create an even bigger stormwater problem with all those black-top parking lots. So, yeah, there you kids. Waynesboro would rather cause more problems for itself than give you anything to do. Wow what a slap in the face.

But, really, shouldn’t you kids be used to getting slapped in the face? I mean the Southern Valley DoeStink administrators have made a habit of it all year long.

Pressure, pressure and more pressure led to three goals for Stuarts Draft girls soccer and a shutout win over Rockbridge.

Yep, pressure.

Looks like 3-0 wins were the sign of the night Tuesday since, you know, Riverheads’ boys went out and did the same thing in their match against Parry McCluer.

Another Southern Valley District win for Waynesboro softball was just what the doctor ordered.

So were Brittnie Siron’s eight strike outs.

So was Kayla Bartley’s 3-for-4 day.

So was Heather Sutton’s home run.

So was Brenda Price scoring two runs.

So is Friday’s game against R.E. Lee.

Really, Fort Defiance has lighted tennis courts? City of Waynesboro, your plane in boarding and these kids can’t wait for it to take off.

If his players don’t want to represent the school, and the team, the way he — a Wilson graduate and former star under Bo Bowers — wants them to, then it’s pretty simple, they just won’t play. (Good on McDaniel, good on him.)

This thing could really catch on, right? I mean, if they really wanted to make money, someone in Fishersville would be pressing out “Respect the Hornet” T-shirts and selling them for 10 bucks a pop at home games. (Heck, you could use the money for something in the athletic department, I’m sure.)

Wouldn’t other schools want to jump in on this money-making idea? I mean, if we’ve learned anything from the Virginia High School League, it’s that money is good, even if it waters down that state championship trophy the kids work so hard for. But I guess some other schools will want a unique slogan (I couldn’t imagine Stuarts Draft players walking around with “Respect The Hornet” T-shirts on. So, let me take it upon myself to offer some suggestions to those other schools who might want to cash in on this.

Respect the Southern Valley District Schedule Makers: You know, because they try so hard to screw up the basketball season.

Respect the Snub: Every time Waynesboro girls basketball team takes the court next year against a Southern Valley District opponent, they should remember that their coach — you know, Secrett Stubblefield — didn’t get coach of the year because she didn’t show up for a meeting. Yeah, good thing they don’t award the Oscars like the good-old boys in the Southern Valley DoesStink awards, well, awards.

Respect the Weather: Really, are we ever going to get this second Waynesboro against Stuarts Draft baseball game in? I’m just asking.

Respect Group AA: You know, the boneheads that decided to follow Group A into splitting basketball divisions.

Respect the Other Sports: Something all Group AA and Group A administrators need to be wearing. Why? Yeah, thanks for making all the other sports not named basketball and football feel really good about themselves. I mean, if you’re going to split your group into divisions in those two sports, why not the others? Wait, we know, cha-ching. So there you go Mr. And Mrs. Young Soccer Player (or Tennis Player, or Track Runner, or Cross Country runner, or Baseball Players, or Softball Player … ) you don’t make the schools any money, so you get treated differently. Way to set a good example you supposed “adults” that run high schools. Way to set a good example.

Respect Swoope: You know, because after two state titles in two seasons at Buffalo Gap, you just gots to, right?

Respect These Cougars: Because when two pals who have played baseball together their whole lives decide to attend the same colleg where they’ll keep playing baaseball together, that’s a great thing for everybody involved.

Respect the Socks: See Christina Fenske.

You got any ideas? Send them my way or slap ‘em down in the comments section. 

Two words.

Derek McDaniel.

Need more proof than that? Then go ahead and read how McDaniel’s biggest struggle this season is getting players to respect the school name on the uniform they wear on the field. Go ahead, read it, soak it in then come back. We’ll leave the light on for you.

(You reading.)

(You reading.)

(You reading.)

OK, you all done? Good.

Just like when McDaniel took over the football program and this slaw-jawed sports columnist and blogger told you it was not a question of “if” Wilson would be back in the Shenandoah District mix, but “when,” the same holds true for baseball. Here’s a guy that knows the value of the Green and White, having played for it in Fishersville and, let’s be honest here, was a blown-out arm away from getting a taste of the Majors. Now, in form that you can only get from a coach that played the same sport at the same high school, McDaniel’s new refrain is simple: RESPECT THE HORNET.

Thankfully, it seems like the kids are getting the idea.

“I didn’t start because I was tardy for my class again,” said Alex Fisher. “It was hard at first to get used to the way the coach disciplines us, but I think the discipline has really helped me and the team do better.”

Good on the Hornets getting the idea and great on McDaniel for, well, just being Derek McDaniel.

And another thing: The bottom line here is if you want to play high school sports you immediately put yourself under a microscope. It’s good practice for those who want to take athletics to the next level where the microscope gets even more powerful. Sorry folks, but yes, life choices sometimes do take place on your field of dreams, no matter how big it is or where the lines are painted.

Yes, we like: All Fort Defiance softball coach Max Hill does is make sure the Indians, a team that is so hungry for some statewide recognition you can hear their tummies rumbling all the way in New Hope, signed a tough out-of-district and out-of-region opponent that, and you never know here, the Indians may see sometime down the road if all goes right for them. And all they do is go out and beat William Monroe 3-0.

“I’m proud of them,” Hill said of his girls. “As young as those girls are, maybe they’re better than I thought.”

These girls are better than Max Hill thinks? That’s scary.

Oh, and please tell me I’m not the only one who thinks Southern Valley soccer should look at what Fort softball did Saturday and take notes. Seriously, we can all sit back and wonder why you could fill a thimble with the teams that made it out or regionals, but we know why. The old Valley teams would only play each other twice and that was it. End of regular season. Now that the districts have split, well, you’d never know it since the Southern Valley and Massanutten are still, for reasons known only to the gods, way too high on playing each other.

Hey, if you want to see where you stand in the state, you have to play teams outside your district and region. Good on Hill. Not so much for Southern Valley soccer. Let’s hope that changes next year (along with a slew of other issues in the Southern Valley.)

One last thing: I gotta agree with Waynesboro coach Jim Critzer on this one. Joseph Lucas will, from this day on, be re-ferred as “Joseph Lucas.”

That it all.

Call him one heck of a goalkeeper, which he obviously is.

Actually, you can go ahead and call him whatever the heck you want to be honest (you know, given that whole “free speech” thing and such). But there’s one thing you don’t want to call Uhler — scared.

Because if there’s one thing out there that soccer fans should know (and you probably do already) it’s that Stuarts Draft is big, much bigger (and talented for that matter) than its 1-2 Southern Valley record shows. And Uhler, despite constant attacks from the bigger Cougars, never backed down and got the shutout he wanted.

“They’re bigger than I’m used to,” he said. “But I wanted the shutout.”

See, now would we lie to you?

And another thing: Let’s talk about little about Draft boys soccer, a team with enough seniors to fill up a Thursday night bowling league that, for some reason or another, can’t pick up more than one Southern Valley win three matches into the season. Maybe coach Chris Loomis was right and knew something the rest of us didn’t when he told us to keep our Umbros on when you look at his team’s potential and that the Cougars hadn’t won anything yet. The bottom line is, and let’s be honest here, if the Cougars want to prove they can match up with the best in the district, they have to beat Waynesboro. The next time Waynesboro and Draft lock up is April 29 and, as Waynesboro coach Bill Meicke said after his team beat the Cougars 4-1 on April 7, “Next time, we have to play them at their place.”

Sure, the smaller field may cause problems for a Little Giants squad used to playing matches on its expansive and palatial pitch (the Cougars don’t have a separate soccer field like Waynesboro, they have to kick it old school, so to speak, on the football field), but we may be expecting more of the same in the second match.

When Stuarts Draft lost to the Little Giants in baseball Tuesday, two-out hits were the issue — the Cougars couldn’t get any. In their 12-0 loss to Fort Defiance on Thursday, just getting a hit was a problem Yep, Daniel “Righty” Wright tossed a five-inning no-hitter and, with the loss, this Southern Valley District baseball race is down to just two horses — Fort and Waynesboro — unless Josh Podgorski, a good baseball mind, can figure out what is wrong. Which, at this point, appears to be hitting, hitting and more hitting. Oh, and defense too.

Daniel “Righty” Wright, your table is ready.

Say What?

After playing for Waynesboro baseball for 4 years, I never felt more of a rivalry then I did when we matched up with TA. It was always TA vs. Waynesboro and thats how it was. 5-4 with Jake Peeling on the mound last year, what a hell of a game.
-- Anonymous

Last’s year’s game as Waynes-boro was a hell of a game, you’re right. You see, “James” (a previous poster who laughed at the notion that Turner Ashby and Waynes-boro were rivals), it doesn’t matter how many times a team loses to another, if they want to beat each other and, while they respect each other, don’t like the other team, then it’s called a rivalry.

Oh, speaking of “James.”

jim sacco you are probably one of the worst sports writers i have witnessed.
-- James

Then you don’t get out much. Actually, there are a lot of other things I’m much worse at. I still haven’t finished Final Fantasy VIII and that came out, what, like 8 years ago? I also leave the toilet seat up which probably makes me the worst husband in the world. So yeah, thanks for playing, “James.”

Finally: Wow. If this ever happens in Augusta County or the two cities, I will lose all faith in humanity and sports and “James” can have my blog.

That is all.